2/2/23 Journaling – Taking Supplements VS Eating A Steak

“The supplement aisle is a very odd place, why buy something there? Instead eat a steak.” – Me

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•8oz ground beef
•potato as home fries
•pack of ramen
•mexican mix cheese
•30oz cream soda

there is zero work today, so that nice meal that should’ve been eaten at around 5pm yesterday will put me to bed just after midnight with a full belly on this rather cold night

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still rather horny (porn without masturbation definitely does that) I chose to masturbate four times, twice around 2am/3am, twice around 830am upon waking

interesting to note, again, that having jerked off I slept deep – six hours being a great night’s sleep

There’s something I want to discuss however, it’s a rationalization which makes sense, but is wrong ;

Being “in for a penny, in for a pound” with vices – extending the fall off the wagon since you’re already there.

(While fall is the wrong choice of english to describe it – your “fall” isn’t a fall, you conscientiously stepped, even jumped, off. It was a choice.

The word “fall” fits as in “fall from grace”, but “fall” as in an accident is not the definition of what’s going on here – it robs your personal accountability out of the act.

And something I’ve learned big time in this life is that effectively 100% of the time, you must own personal accountability over the situation whatever it is.

This society nurtures masses of crybabies, who as a whole never stop and own their situation, so called adults shitting in diapers vs lacing up their work boots with pride every morning joyous for the necessary honest, regardless of difficulty, work.)

For me it’s thinking “I’m already clean shaven, what’s extending that another day by watching porn and/or masturbating going to hurt”.

That’s a rationalization to sin. The proper act is to pray for forgiveness, forgive yourself, choose to step forward, to not stagnate longer in your vice, being clean again immediately upon the cessation of that brief moment off the straight and narrow.

so again, Again, AGAIN I’ll be clean shaven the day after tomorrow

No more of this undisciplined bullshit.
It’s been 15 months of wishy washy with this shit, that’s more than long enough to sack up, stop being a weak impulsive little bitch under the sheet, and be right.

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Lunch :

•smorgasbord bowl – leftover 8oz ground beef, ½ potato of homefries put into bowl of chicken stew which has chickpeas, barley, carrots, onion, and celery in it
•two slices buttered sourdough toast
•16oz cranberry juice

everyone could eat like this – it’s eating well, very nutritious

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It still surprises me that I’m so close to 300lbs at 6′.

Funny looking back that at 15 years old I thought that I’d never be over 180lbs despite having entered high school at almost 215lbs…it was the then losing the better part of 50lbs by the lowest I saw as a sophomore on a wrestling scale – which I thought small, but still is heavier than many – this is what messed with me thinking I’d stay that small.

I could eat for fat loss basically either keto or lots of fish.

I could continue to eat as I do – just stick mostly to nutritious foods.

If I stay working as a mover some fat loss is expected over the summer where there’s much more hours.

Running. I should be running, and am barely using winter ground as excuse not to right now.

The kettlebell is a godsend, it forces me to train capacities other than just strength.

I realized this, and have experienced it in the past, an active heavy set dude gains super powers when he drops weight to a normal size, still big mind you, but small for him.

I can always sprint fast, but in the low 200s I can run well.

215lbs for me is definitely running ability, but it may be higher, 225, 235 even.

I don’t think I look like a guy who weighs 285lbs. I don’t see the sheer size.

Though clean shaven there’s a double chin, and a good deal of chub on my stomach I don’t see it.

Even with my muscular shoulders and chest I don’t see it.

Whether you look at it from a muscular or fat standpoint I have a hard time seeing myself as this heavy.

Though the lack of wind during random shit is proof of it.

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Walking 20 miles to a marathon daily, while time consuming, is moreso a basic human physical capability than anything.

We could all have the ability.

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watched a movie, good for a laugh, but that grey area again

I’ve watched zero some years – will I demand zero television type time from myself, or is this something I don’t consider?

•half bag frosted animal cookies with the movie

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Lift :

Mismatch Press

14 reps kb r
10 reps kb l
6 reps kb l
2 reps kb r

The first set I’ll say = PR, as it felt like it’s worth at least the same number of reps with a 185lb barbell, probably more as you’re fighting to keep the bells from drifting away from your center line – the presses were very fast going up

on last two sets I held db at hang, kb at rack – consciously flexing my wrist inward like arm wrestling at the top with the kettlebell, trying for a high level of full body tension – a nice way to flex, build mind-muscle connection, and keep the body under load

a neighbor walking his dog joked “good thing you were here with the kettlebell tonight, you won’t be tomorrow”…

tomorrow is going to cold, zero degrees cold plus windchill to feel about -10°F – even if it’s one set I’ll get my hands on the kettlebell after work – with these retro looking boat basketball shoes, track pants, hoodie, skull cap, these awesome uline mover’s gloves on…I disregard the temperatures – I’ll be outside lifting

fuck hiding indoors

we’re meant to be outside daily year round

•quart coffee milk drank between sets

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one meal a day, done as dinner at a restaurant could be an unexplored social avenue

the lack of social life has hurt these past 15 months

I’d rationalized that pain into being a bitch watching porn, jerking off

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dude, whatever it takes – get your beard back

though Saturday morning is that “shave as punishment” requirement

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crossfit does some stuff right

I like the idea of running high frequency conditioning, just a bit of strength work after

eventually you’re strong, but have a gas tank to go with it

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•8oz grape juice
•10oz steak
•1½ potatoes as homefries
•24oz cream soda

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I paid $3/lb for london broil last week, but this week it, top round, and ny strip were all $6/lb.

Last week I bought the london broil as it was the best price I’d seen in years, the normal sale price precovid.

With all three cuts at $6/lb however I selected a nice looking ny strip, the leanest of the three cuts, and enjoyed cooking my ~20oz chunk of delicious cow which has now been split into two meals.

Tonight’s, and tomorrow’s dinners nearly identical (tonight I was extra hungry and ate 1½ of the two potatoes I cooked) having home fries alongside the chunk of meat.

With steak seemingly going to always cost $4-6/lb, the 80/20 ground beef being $3.50/lb unless bought in giant tubes for ~$2.80/lb at best…it makes more sense for me to purchase and eat the slabs of meat vs ground.

I feel ground is better than no meat, but that steaks are two steps higher in nutritional value than ground.

Instinctively I know that the body processes the less processed steak better than the ground meat.

It too may be that dollar for dollar the body’s yield is higher with the steaks because of the above.

So I go steak, ground beef much less often.

Funny, with the worst food prices in my lifetime that I’m eating the best food – I reached the buy in point of just spending whatever I have to spend.

I’m at other a pound of meat daily right now. I take this as headed in the right direction.

Every meal could be 10oz steak and a potato.

Even with steak prices, the fact I eat less meals on work days would keep this to under $100 a week.

Steak and potatoes unlocks the inner animal – it’s robust feeding for physical strength.

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A 20:00 to 45:00 emom with power cleans could be my way to improve the power clean for pressing aside from the bell work’s carryover.

Just start at 185 for 20 emom, easy peasey, then up 5lbs or add 5:00, until you’re going 45:00 with a bunch of weight, doing this session on a weekly or twice monthly basis.

You’re still lifting daily, cause that’s how I get strong.

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is titan going to sell me a bar with center knurling and some bumpers…for one arm snatching

…and to have a second bar so as to mix exercises press & one arm snatch or press & overhead squat…

it seems I’m going deeper into The Cold Air Barbell Club

$300 to seriously diesel my pull strength with the longest pull, and adding 70lbs to the top weight I can load at home, from 500 to 570lbs, which pull that and you’re good for 600lbs…

make the purchase chase the deadlift this summer?

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10 – pretty late for pushups ~9pm

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ground beef and ramen is the lazy alternative to the steak and potatoes

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WOD Type Ideas :

Pullup & Power Clean

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I could start overhead squatting lots again.

That titan purchase I’m considering would make it real simple to superset that with some form of pull on the other bar.

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20, 10, 5, 5

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10, 10

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Persistence & Tenacity