10/8/22 ~1130pm
Oh man, it’s working.
We’ll see how far into this smorgasbord of restaurant and grocery store food I’ll get.
Similar menus, ground beef and broccoli on both.
I ate half my employee comped burger, scarfed it down as leftover ground beef, mac (technically shells), and veggies (this meal being what I called half a week’s food prep) with my employee comped portion of broccoli added to it – heated up.
The leftovers alone would be a usual big meal, a day’s food in general, but today I spent ~11h in the kitchen (plus that nice hour in the sun on break), smashed my morning PT in 5:00 before work, did my mace swings after, will do another set of pushups before the day is done, in general just had a high metabolic day.
I was moving around more at work then necessary, it feels better that way – hadn’t done so in months ←this is the way to approach it.
“Waste” (ie spend well) that energy dancing around, dipping down to check the oven, playing drums with the spatula, moving in the moment, three trips into the fridge instead of one because because because because
It’s part of the wonderful thing I does!
…
I can’t wait to lift before work tommorow!
That’s a positive that I’ve got.
Got the power cleans, got the sldl, got the presses.
Wow – what I was going to say :
All the hours on my feet.
All the morning and evening PT.
All the mace swings, all the lifts, all the beef and broccoli – my torso is clearly leaner than it was two weeks back.
I don’t see it in my face yet, but the beard is going to hide that anyway!
It’s growing back!
I’m not going to mess that up.
Work was capital B, bullshit, I think they were tossing extra food in my to go container, I’ve got like three days worth of food from this one shift, – the manager even admitting that I had every right to walk, quit, cause of shit on the shift.
shit on shift
sos
Shit on a shingle is good.
Which reminds me of my Grandpa.
Bullshit at work?
I stuck.
I stuck.
I stuck!
Less than three weeks til a year there. I’m doing that to say I did.
Fuck you, I’m not quitting cause you’re a little prick. You walk out. This is my job.
I backed my car into the spot, popped the door, swung out a leg, picked up a piece of sentimental value, a piece of my first car…a bit of plastic from the interior of my Grandpa’s car – which he willed to me when he passed when I was 14.
“I swear Grandpa”, a tear in my eye as I held that piece of plastic THAT I NEVER LOST ;
(My car version of a pocket treasure.)
I’m not masturbating.
I’m not running like a bitch to, my vice of choice, porn – not being a bitch cause a dead end job showed to be dead end with a miserable kitchen fuck, a rude waiter, and (not there today, but in general) a manager with his napoleon complex or something against me.
Fuck that! I’ve got pushups to do.
Late 2021 and basically all of 2022 has been a lesson for me in the world TRYING to tell me what I am (basically a big ball of “not good enough”), and me STARING IT IN THE EYE, & Spitting…NO I’M NOT!
I was weak and watched porn.
I put myself into this situation…
And I’m growing wings. Digging? Nah, Rising like a phoenix.
I couldn’t tell you when I did mantra pushups last…before a minute ago.
60ish, mantras – power
I’m the Man I am
I know who I am, he’s not what you say, he’s what I say – he’s great!
…
Approach each day with a smile, be the one who radiates positivity, spite the negative shit around you.
Your life is your personal challenge to thrive. Smile. Pray. Take action. Live. Thrive.
Make life so eventful there’s no such thing as considered minutia.
Persistence & Tenacity