Isometrics

As word is bond, I have to write this post. This is not the post that I flow wrote, and used my allotted writing time on. That post is now scheduled to drop on Sunday evening, a time where it’s very fitting. So without further ado… A look at Isometrics.

Now I could bore myself, and you to tears with all sorts of scientific definitions, but I’ve decided not to.

Started to type them out, then deleted them.

Not My Voice.

You want the precise terms? Google.

Isometrics are old school, and old school didn’t bother about pussy shit.

What works works, and what doesn’t doesn’t.

And Isometrics Work.

So do their cousins such as Dynamic Tension.

What you use just boils down to what equipment you have, and what your goals are.

Science + Overcoming

Trying for a bigger deadlift and have a sticking point? Pull against an immovable object as near to that angle as you can.

According to science its all about the joint angle.

But how important is it though?

Ideal for this situation is said to be a light to moderate loaded bar set up under pins in the power rack. You’re looking to add a bit of movement, the breaking off the floor to sticking point, and pull hard there. Hell I’ve even seen this work for a kid as part of his deadlift routine.

But what if you don’t have the luxuries of a power rack, or weights at all?

For six months once my back work consisted primarily of two things:

  1. One Arm Standing Rows- pulling against the inside of a door frame, doing my best to simulate db rows equipmentless.
  2. Deadlift simulation- one or two handed, pulling againt the handrail of my complexes hot tub

My deadlift max went up 30-40 lbs in that time, and my consistency of my grip strength went up far more than that.

Was the angle close?

Not really.

But I trained as best I could given the circumstances. I put in effort. Isometrics were all I had, and I damn sure wasn’t going to get weaker.

As they say sometimes doing the work, and just showing up is the biggest thing.

Old School.

Holds

Want to build some weird strength?

Make your 1rm seem light?

Unrack the bar from the top and hold it.

Use anti-death measures such as pins, and/or a spot.

Maybe add in a bit of movement, partial reps.

Maybe add in progressively longer movements.

Isometrics still right?

Whatever.

It works.

Here’s an idea, lockout a heavy deadlift for time.

Maybe do some farmers walks with whatever you can.

How bout the man-maker of Heavy rack pull/Hand and Thigh lift held at the top for time.

Tell me that doesn’t make you significantly stronger.

And

Yielding + Dynamic?

While not technically isometrics some more concepts are taken from martial arts.

Throw some kicks or punches, but don’t throw them.

Push the punch against a wall.

Same concept with kicks.

Maybe slowly and controlled  throw a side kick or back kick and then hold for time.

Maybe do your best Sanchin kata, or maybe just emulate with block, punches, kicks of your choice.

Flexing

Simple, pick a pose.

The manliest ones are most muscular, and front double biceps.

In that order.

Get your Arnold On.

Like Him

-J Out

P.S.

Look up York Barbells old isometric work, which could be summed up as pulling/pushing against power rack pins in top/middle/bottom positions, and with pulls,squats, and presses.  Could be used for any exercise though. Bill Starr, Bill March,Paul Anderson, hell Louie Simmons mentions isometrics from time to time.Jamie Lewis at ChaosandPain.

What else?

Good Enough Resource Google-able knowledge dropping.

No Limits

 

 

 

Homeless Bodybuilding/Training

Im tempted to go sell everything, trade my car in for a van and drive out west to become a  homeless bodybuilding (powerbuilding) bum by choice.

I know i can out train dirty eating. My life has been dirty eating. Lower protein(than recommended) and dirty.

Dumpster dive Little Caesars for the GAINNZZZ. Bro?

Soup kitchens, top ramen, cheap/cheat shit, and begging bites. Food Stamps?

Get a camping spot near the beach, swim, calisthenics, running, sprints, flexing all day long. I guaranfuckingtee I’d be jacked and tan living at a SoCal park. Shit some parks in LA have bars…..AND RINGS!!!!!!

Maybe a cheap barbell off of Craigslist. Shit maybe just fill some contractor clean up bags with beach sand, I already have the size ridiculous navy dufflebag.  Odd object lifting, it builds freaky strength. Particularly in the back and hands.

Maybe go to Vegas, and get gym memberships. EOS, and either 24 Hour Fitness or LVAC. EOS is decent for the hardcore style at $10 month, LVAC nice bathrooms for $25 monthly combine both. Lifting and cleanliness for $35 monthly. Never did lift at a 24 in that town, heard they’re more expensive though.

Free food, cheap ass food, and easy prep. If eggs are reasonable just drink them ala rocky, or maybe mix with some form of liquid in a big ass cup like from an empty XXXXXXL Slushee, hell you could mix them with the 69¢ XXXXXXL Slushee.

Go fancy and get yourself a ninja blender. Then get odd looks making POWER CONCOCTIONS using the gyms electrical outlets. Eggs and Oats and Oats and Eggs and Whatever Else Too! (Gotta sing song this) DRINK THE YOLK ALSO, ALL OF THEM! Wusses.

It’s all food for thought. What would you do to achieve your goals?

Would being homeless keep you from being jacked, or would you get it on the street like the French Guy below?

Don’t let circumstance dictate your abilities. If you want to be jacked go get jacked in the most sane or insane way that fits you, and only you personally.

Somewhere out there is a smelly broke bum, getting it in (on?). What’s stopping you? Hell have you ever seen an unlean homeless man? Up the cals and you’ll be JACKED!

Get It – J Out

ATTENTION: AS A DISCLAIMER THIS IS RANTING, IT IS NOT TO BE TAKEN AS SERIOUS ADVICE. BECOMING A HOMELESS JACKED BODYBUILDER (POWERBUILDER) IS UP TO YOU, AND YOU ONLY. I AM NOT TO BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR THE RESULTS. UNLESS IT WORKS, PARTICULARLY WHEN IT’S SUCCESSFUL BEYOND YOUR WILDEST DREAMS.THEN I WANT ALL THE CREDIT. Haha END TRANSMISSION.