8/1/20 Gym Conversation

I spoke with a 58 year old man. The conversation started in the locker room, and traveled to the parking lot where we ended up talking for about two hours.

A pretty friendly guy, in our conversation some interesting stuff came out.

We talked about the perspective of difficulty in the gym.

He was saying that he’d talked with a couple college age kids who were getting to around 5p a side on the leg press, likes it’s a big deal, and had offered him a work in to which he politely declined unsure as to if he could.

He told me, that another night, he went back, and tested by himself, and was able to go heavier than that, surprised that he was stronger on legs than some 20ish guys, when he’s almost 60, and had a leg which had never fully been the same after a broken femur with metal inserted from a construction accident 25 years ago.

He spoke to me of having worked scrapping metal, and just how heavy/ridiculous stuff he’d get to his truck by himself or occasionally with a hired hand could be.

He has a strong dislike for carrying bathtubs. He told me he’ll be a happy man never removing a bathtub again.

I told mover stories at that point in the conversation.

We agreed that a labor background can and will make the gym be perceived as far easier than those who come up in a gym, particularly one as mamby pamby as planet fitness can be sometimes, take it to be.

A kid I train with told me over text he’d tore his shoulder muscle. I didn’t even get into it over text, holding off on going “so we’ll be training legs…right!” I can help this kid, but I prefer face to face teaching. I mentioned this as we were discussing generational attitudes to work.

I got a kick out of him telling me as a young man he had jet black hair (from his portuguese side of the family), and how he was jealous of an asian college kid with a pristine hair cut/style and the jet black hair he’s missing now that it’s grey, and being pissed at the kid playing with his hair, and texting far more than actually working on the machine he was actually waiting for. That kid had him peeved on multiple fronts.

He told me he liked the gym far better back in the 80s, headphones weren’t on everyone. He felt the earbuds make the gym less friendly, and people less approachable. He despises headphoned up as the norm in gym culture.

On those notes I told him how amongst my gym circle, I’m usually the only one who will ask for work ins, how much longer they need the equipment, etc.

He liked that, was telling me that my mindset of “just ask” to override the waiting, angry staring while waiting silently, and related shit is a great way to play it. He was impressed with the social confidence that shows.

We got a laugh at a lot of gym culture in general.

He hates seeing young men playing with their phones harder than they work out, and despises those with no muscle mass trying to flex in the mirror what isn’t there yet.

We talked a lot about training partners being relatively hard to come by. He has a 30yo neighbor who words say let’s do it, but actions say nope. It blows his mind how lazy a bunch of young men are. His neighbor’s excuses were Grade A rationalizations, such as finding a reason as to why he can’t accept a ride from his supposed training partner.

He goes on long bike rides, and in the past has had this neighbor, half his age, tap “it’s too far”.

He liked how I help this college kid, was telling me that I’m good at motivating others to push. Said he’d like to do leg press with me, thinks I’d make it so he can’t fail to get to 1000lbs on the machine in his unspoken competition with young men on the machine.

Obviously his philosophy on the leg press is a bit different than mine. But hey, I liked how he’s 58 and determined to blow college bro minds on the machine. You could see his displeasure at pf management when he realized they removed the second set of loading bars from the hammer strength machine. I had told him of a ridiculous drop set I’d done at a different gym, same leg press, but without the pf modification.

We talked eating a bit, I was surprised that he’s pretty strict about one meal a day. He does it as an evening feeding. We talked food selections, and cooking (what it’s called outside of gym culture which insists on calling it food prep). We talked about how men can be good cooking on $5 a day, and how we can budget that. We both strongly agreed on basic foods, not fancy, stuff our grandparents would recognize.

I got a kick out of him saying “I think you could teach me how to eat to get six pack abs”.

Weirdly he’s not into using the crockpot. Doesn’t own one, told me he’d view using it as a fire hazard. That’s very much different than my view, I love the thing, it’s the bomb for a man eating well inexpensively, and isn’t a fire hazard.

We discussed Frank Sinatra on a brief non gym note, and even discussed the proper shaking of hands, even practicing it for a few repetitions.

He got a laugh at me saying how I think the chicks at pf train harder than the dudes.

While I’m not used to getting to teach people old enough to be my parent, I find it refreshing when people, anyone, are open minded, see that I’m knowledgeable, and are willing to learn.

I’ve taught gym stuff to those younger than me, shared ideas with some slightly older than me, but I have to say doing so with someone my father’s age was something of a step up for me, a mental breakthrough as to my own value.

I’m knowledgeable.
People see it, respect it, and want to learn.

This is incredibly rewarding for me, as I love being able to spread my knowledge.

Persistence & Tenacity

7/31/20 : Emotional Music & Burpees

I emotionally tormented myself by listening to “sippin on fire” on repeat while hitting 5 pump burpees.

I was a little hard on myself with the self talk.

“I’d rather die than stop the workout shy of 50 reps.”

As “I” didn’t feel like doing the burpees or the following pushups (the only time I’ve felt like that about pushups in a long while).

“I’m not stopping the song regardless. I’ll deal with the emotions.”

I knew this would be the more challenging part.

Songs can have strong emotional effects on and connotations to you.

“Sipping on fire” brings me to 20/21 years old, west coast, extremely lonely, sad, and yet hopeful.

Getting those emotions in me, during this corona shit, was “perfect I need this, attempting to break myself emotionally – I’ll strengthen”.

I was borderline tearing up, was singing under my breath, feeling the feeling of being alone parked at a late night vegas red light…the streetlight there, the sidewalk empty, no cars around, still 5-10 minutes out from my apartment.

One thing I know is emotional pain strengthens you. This is as long as you don’t try to hide from it with some negative addictive behavior.

That’s the difference between me and many of my age group. I never smoked up or drank, and have ridden myself of porn. I always wanted to feel fully, and was honest with myself that I was using porn to hide from painful emotions.

Hiding from painful emotions is what people do with negative addictions/habits, that’s what vices do they attempt to distract from reality, hide the pain.

I made myself borderline cry from the emotions inflicted while doing easy pace burpees.

25 reps in I allowed myself a physical rest, but not from the emotional music. This had me get back to it more quickly.

Finished with the burpees, having got through the musical (the more difficult part), I switched tones, to manowar and a folk song.

And you know what came from the whole thing?

After first emotional pain, then music full of hope?

Charisma boost.

Charisma comes strongly after a whole lot of emotional pain, when you then choose to be on top of the world, when you choose to never self harm.

This happens on both a short term and long term scale.