Now according to gym rules this may be dirty as hell, and leads most to say I couldn’t possibly be functional on such a diet. But just like my lack of a training program, I fly in spite of the circumstance. My food intake is not even IIFYM(If It Fits Your Macros), at best it could be defined as a near disregard to what I eat.Here it is.
To Be A Vulture
Firstly I eat what’s available. I’m like a vulture, or maybe a goat. Probably some combination of both to be honest. I will eat anything. Don’t want to finish your meal, I got this. Oh you’re giving me that food, ok I’ll eat it. (I was once given 6 dozen + donuts, I ate most that weekend, 48 hrs of donuts, almost nothing else, and 1000+ pushups a day, jump rope, and swimming)
Honestly I always had the mentality that I’d just out train my diet. I can remember saying this after one too many days of cutting weight. I’d rather add 1000 calories of activity than not eat the food. Plus I do lots of calisthenics and random work outside of the gym.
But to the meat of things.
How To Grocery Shop For A Broke Bulk
When I’m grocery shopping, and I learned this while broke as fuck, I separated food into the two simple categories
- Protein Source
- Calorie Source
I paid no heed to the carb vs fat content of the calories sources, I just looked for low cost items that i enjoy.
Cost efficient was defined in 2 ways:
- Grams Protein/$
- Calories/$
I looked for 40 + grams protein per dollar, but would occasionally let this slide to 30-35( pork/beef)
For calories I tried to get 1000+ per dollar. White rice, and top ramen max this at 2000-2500cals per dollar. Dollar store generic cookies hit 1200.
Generic soda is in this ballpark, as are generic pop tarts.
I was ok letting it slide as low as 500 calories per dollar though.
Unlike most I can thrive on “crap” foods, and happen to enjoy food combinations that no one else does.
I happened to just eat a bowl consisting of 2 packs ramen w chicken flavor packs, 1/2 cup oats, a bunch of mexican 4 cheese mix, and a decent amount of pepperoni thrown together. I almost added peanut butter, or tuna, but wasn’t feeling either at the time.( I have mixed all of the above in the past though)
Now that I’ve mentioned that run the cost and macros. Easily 1500 calories, prep/cooking 5 minutes, and the cost ~$1.50. 60+ grams protein, fuck ton of carbs and fat. Honestly I’m probably low balling all the numbers but cost. It’s probably close to 2k calories. The ramen and oats alone hit 1k.
$30-50 wk
If you have the time to train a shit ton, and not much cash you could still bulk on less than $30 week. Hell with $50 you could buy far more than you could possibly eat.
Check this:
Round here we have eggs for 75¢ or less per dozen ( Walmart by the 60ct, or grocery store sales), milk is $1.99-2.60 gallon (depends on store) rice 2olbs for $11, Ramen 12 packs cost $1.99. Chicken leg quarters cost $7 for 10lb bags. Hell ground beef costs a bit under $2lb in 5 or 10lb rolls.
For calories, you can get generic junk food cheap. Cookies, pop tarts, soda. The cream soda doesn’t taste any different, root beer depends on the store. Hell sometimes the dollar stores carry canned fish, mackerel, or salmon where you can open, drain and get 40-60grams protein ready made for a dollar. Others may hate you for the smell though. And shit I forgot pork rinds, dollar store carries those too ,50 grams protein a dollar there in snack form.
So say $30 week, thats $4 daily, with $2 left over.
First off the calories need to be high. So ramen.
For protein we’re looking at cheap meat or eggs, milk can be an option too.
Eating Plan
An example of each days food:
- 6 packs Ramen. $1, 2400 cals, 60g protein
- 2 lbs chicken leg quarter, $1.40, 1200 cals, 70g protein
- 1 dozen eggs, 75¢, 840 cals, 72 g protein
- 1/3 gallon of milk, 67¢, 800 cals, 42 g protein
That’s roughly 5000 calories and ~245 grams protein day at a cost of $3.82 day.
Technically I came in at $26.74 week. Theres a little left over for more.
Hell $50 wk can involve better foods, but imagine that is just too much for you right now. Off the top of my head 3 lbs ground beef, 6 packs ramen a day, similar cals, similar protein. That’s the no thinking version but put some thought into it, you can do much better here, and rotate in awesome stuff like steak or bacon.
At either price point you could cycle the meats a bit more, or lose the milk and sub with meat or eggs.
Eggs are essentially the SUPERFOOD.
$30 wk, broke but bulked.
Make sure you move a lot though.
How Many Meals + The Trick To Pigging Out
Now that plan could be 2 meals daily for the ravenous, or those who don’t like eating frequently. 3 squares for just about anyone. If you cant eat big, or like the frequency sit down 4 times. A dozen eggs isnt that huge, nor a lb of leg quarter. Milk is easy to drink whenever.
The secret to eating copious amounts is to eat as much as you can in a roughly 20 minute period from the first bite to end.
Split that plan into 2-4 meals it’ll fit easily in the time frame.
Cook the chicken bulk, and reheat a lb per meal, let the chicken cool, and microwave the ramen. Sit a large glass and the milk container at the table. Wait till the chicken is cool enough to use your hands, and start. The eggs can be fried , or for the lazy microwaved into the ramen. Raw eggs are fine. Salmonella has been way overblown.
Mind you I consider this dirty eating, and I eat very dirty.
It may not be the healthiest. So as I said move a LOT.
I wouldn’t cut conditioning here. Bad shit happens when you do.
But this will support strength and mass.
I’d consider healthy eating organic keto. I personally never buy organic though.(Still broke)
Healthy with in reason to me is steak and mashed potatoes.(Not organic)
Do what you gotta do. Any circumstance can be worked with.
-J