I had set a cold glass of water down on a paper towel to my right, moved my giant print kjv bible to me, opened it, set a timer on my plugged in and charging cellphone for just over an hour, started the timer, set my phone down to the left, pressed screen off, and started reading.
I say that I’ve done too much “doomscrolling” on instagram since I actually started posting there, and generally disliking when I watch anything have even noticed it’s hard for me to sit through not even a movie, but a cartoon.
The last thing I watched was a tom and jerry episode on youtube, and with that I’m starting a fast from watching television in all its forms again.
Feels to me that my life is lacking discipline, and that’s a step which makes sense to me.
But again, I’d been noticing I don’t pay attention to much of anything for any length of time really.
I read hours…of articles, and notice that often I am just skimming them, besides them being only minutes long.
So reading, timed without allowing myself to get distracted makes a whole lot of sense as a drill in self improvement.
The hour felt long.
My internal clock wasn’t great as to figuring how minutes it was compared to pages.
I even started to have doubts as to whether I’d hit start on the timer, yet knew that I’d watched the seconds start ticking down – 1:01:00, 1:00:59, 1:00:58 -I’d set an extra minute to make sure it truly was an hour, not a few seconds less even.
Now I type this up while drinking the not quite room temperature water I hadn’t touched while pointedly and purposely reading.
In youth I was a voracious reader.
Public school somewhat damaged my inquisitiveness, and in adulthood it’s been ____ (I don’t want to really call it struggle) to get that back.
Can’t make excuses. Heck, I’ve had roughly equal amounts of time away from schooling as I had in.
Part of adulthood to me, is to be and become, to become and be self taught looking towards success at concept of “renaissance man”.
In many aspects my grade would be an F.
Money. Dude, money. Bro, money. The fact I’m not fluent in any language that I’ve been practicing. The fact I do not play an instrument consistently.
(my trombone collects dust while a used saxophone or trumpet is something I have not purchased, and I do not have space for piano and have not went down the more easily done modern route…the keyboard)
This month is russian.
Next month is spanish.
I’d already chosen this as another act of self discipline.
But there are things where I get an A.
The fact my pushups every day are past the nine year mark for example.
In a way my strength with kettlebells, though I feel I could be far more elite and advanced with them.
And it’s at least a C+ to be aware of all the needed improvements to self.
Anyway, I felt I should read, READ, and not be all a.d.d. about it – to actually insist I at least go through the motions of paying attention.
Sit. Read. Turn Page. Repeat. Til Timer Dings.
Because we can do this sort of discipline.
It is both a choice, and a “muscle” – both choose and develop.
I’ve got a book out from the library. A classic. Why not read through those…for free. I haven’t yet opened it. It may soon be due.
…I go and check…okay, I’ve got time still…
Yesterday I had zero calories.
Today I had around 5000 calories.
Based on today it’s possible that 6000 calorie days haven’t been infrequent/aren’t uncommon.
Yeah, dude that’s why you weigh 295lbs.
You eat bunches and overall.don’t do a meaningful volume of cardio.
That seems to be my struggle in bodybuilding, to actually not eat so dang much – I’m dang good at force feeding, cause it no longer seems to be force feeding!
I can put down food!
Tomorrow will be an almost keto, almost carnivore 3000ish calories.
I’ll cook up ground beef as either burgers or as chunks, will dip it in a small amount of guacamole, and will make instant mashed potatoes in the dripping.
I do not like wasting nutrition. Instant mashed potatoes is the easiest way to use fat.
Maybe a glass of milk. Maybe try a drizzle of honey on some of the beef.
I think a rotation like that will work for me.
Fast day at least weekly. “Free” (within limits) day after the fast day. Keto/borderline carnivore days – working towards more of the days being these.
Shockingly I have been doing cardio consistently.
(it’s just not enough to justify 6000 calories/day)
Step Ups
Bleachers recently seemed a decent bit harder on the wind than them however.
Maybe that’s the truth, that perception. Maybe it was simply the mugginess.
No matter.
I don’t own a concept2 rower. Every other available type of cardio feels like a chore.
But I’m consistent with step ups, and have been making myself do them the second I’m done with the day’s lift – often then doing the day’s hindu squats.
I’ve been doing daily hindu squats, and rocking a practically perpetual sandbag related upper back pump.
I’m still needing to do more off camera training.
The stuff for getting towards first the x100 unbroken hindu squats.
Treating 2h swings and/or both light sandbag shouldering and shoulder squats as volume.
I still kick at the idea of joining a gym, but it’d likely give me concept2 and maybe strongman implement access.
I intended to social media fast, not film for a month or three, and let my months of shorts/month of long form videos post out in schedule – talking youtube.
For whatever reason I tend to give reddit the video first, often instagram before youtube, but that one varies considerably.
State Of The Union As It Were
Be strong y’all, and no excuses.
Persistence & Tenacity